When I began NaBloPoMo this month, it was in large part because I needed to write. I was (am) a new mom, and there were too many voices telling me that I wouldn’t write anymore, that my writerly life was over now.
That’s all silly, of course, but it has its roots in something sturdy: writing with a newborn is hard. Let me use today as an example. In the spirit of the challenge of NaBloPoMo, I decided not to write the final post yesterday when I had time and energy and Gus was cooperating by taking awesome naps. Past Dana is a fool because today has been a busy day of trying my best to calm a fussy baby who would not be calmed. I sat on the floor with him and showed him books and held his teething ring and played his beloved Baby Einsteins musical toy for him over and over again – my dreams are haunted by the William Tell Overture – and Gus repaid me with kicks and stretches and so much crying and fussing. We walked the neighborhood, we walked the grocery store. He refused milk. He slept in twenty minute stretches and woke at the slightest noise.
And so here I am, as he sleeps – finally – trying to muster the energy to blog, to say something worthwhile. When what I want to do is cry and eat some ice cream and sleep for more than two hours.
I did NaBloPoMo to prove I could. To come back to my blog. And being back has felt like coming home. This month has been amazing, and I have proven to myself that I can write each day, and when my baby takes a decent nap, I can really maximize my time. I have stoked the fire.
I decided to look at some data. I blogged (including today) for 28 days this month; 28 blog posts between November 1 and November 30.
Between January 1, 2015 and October 31, 2016, I blogged 24 times.
Which means that I have blogged more this month than I have in the past (almost) two years.
That’s not a small thing.
I’ve written too many posts in the past about being “back,” about having fixed whatever was wrong in my life and now I’m ready to blog because I’ve set arbitrary goals and it! will! happen! But now, I don’t need to do that. The foundation has been laid. I completed NaBloPoMo, and I have a writing life and a baby, and I know I can do it.